Letters from Adina - #29a

Letter XXIX (i). The Last Supper.

"Remember my last words - Love one another. In this shall all men know that ye are my disciples.’’

My Dear Father,

With what feelings of grief and amazement I commence this letter, you can scarce conceive.

Jesus, the Prophet of God, is a prisoner to the Roman power! He is accused of making Himself a king, and of conspiring to re-establish the throne of David.

To-day, after eating the Passover with His twelve chosen friends, and instituting a new and peculiar feast with wine and bread, which He told them impressively to hold in remembrance of Him, He went forth towards Olivet; and there seating himself beneath the shade of a tree, He talked with them very sadly, saying that His hour was come, that He had ended His work, and that he was about to be delivered into the hands of sinful men.

John, upon being questioned by cousin Mary and myself, gave the following narrative—

It was evening, and the south side of Olivet lay in deep shadow. We were all sorrowful. We felt each one of us, as if some grievous evil was to come upon us. The tones of our beloved Master’s voice moved us to tears, quite as much as His words, which were full of mystery.

We were all present, excepting Iscariot, who had remained in the city to discharge the cost of the Passover Supper, and pay for the hire of the room.

At that supper Jesus had said very plainly, that one of our number would betray Him into the hands of the priests, who, since His triumphant entry into the Holy City, when the multitude ran before Him and followed after Him, shouting hosannas and proclaiming Him Messias, had diligently sought His life.

When we heard our Lord say these strange words in accents of touching reproach, we were all deeply moved; and Peter and the rest at once questioned Him, to know which of them should do this thing.

“Lord,is it I?” asked one; and another, “Lord, is it I?"

I was resting at the moment, with my face on the shoulder of Jesus, and said, softly: ‘‘Lord, who is it that betrayeth Thee? I will forthwith lay hands upon him, and prevent his doing thee harm!”

Jesus shook his head, and gently smiling, said: “My beloved, brother, thou knowest not what thou sayest. The Son of Man must needs be betrayed by His own friends, but woe unto him who betrayeth Him. Mark which of the Twelve dippeth bread with me into the dish.’’

I looked, and saw Judas reach forward and dip into the dish at the same instant with Jesus; but in his eagerness, or from the knowledge of guilt, his hand trembled; he spilled the salt over the board, and the sop fell from his grasp into the bowl; upon which Jesus gave him the piece he held, saying to him -

‘‘Judas, that thou doest, do quickly!’’

We were surprised at the voice and manner in which this was spoken, but supposed the words had reference to some of Judas’ worker as bearer of the purse, little suspecting what fearful thing he was to do.

Instantly Judas rose from the table, and without a reply, or casting a look at any of us, went out.

For a few moments after his footsteps had ceased to be heard, there prevailed a heavy silence in the chamber; for a strange fear had fallen upon us, why we could not tell; and looking into one another’s faces, and then into our dear Master’s, we seemed to await some dread event.

His face was placid, and full of love, as he looked upon us. The momentary cloud, which shaded His noble profile when He spoke to Judas had all passed off, and there was the serenity of a cloudless sky in His face.

“What was the mysterious feast which He instituted?” asked Mary, interrupting him here.

“Well may you call it mysterious.” he answered. As we were eating the Passover, Jesus took up bread, and, blessing it by a solemn set of consecration, broke it with His hands and gave a portion to each of us, saying with it -

“Take, eat; this is my body.”

Awed and amazed by His manner and by the act, we all received and ate it as He commanded us to do (for who there would disobey his Lord?) as reverently as if it were the holy shewbread of the Temple, dedicated to God’s use.

When we had eaten in silence what we perceived was the institution of a new and most sacred feast, He took up the cup of wine, and consecrated it also by giving thanks and blessing.

The hallowed cup He now offered to each one of us. We all drank of it with deep devotion; for He said to us - “I will drink no more with you the fruit of the vine until that day that I drink it new in the kingdom of God.”

He also said of the wine - “This is my blood.”

“And how do you understand these words, that the consecrated bread was His body, and the wine His blood?” I asked of the disciple.  

“That is a question I cannot answer,” said John. “It is a mystery. But my Lord says it shall be made clear to us hereafter.”

We then sang the Passover hymn to God and went out at our Lord’s command to go to Olivet. As we went He discoursed with us.

“My children,’’ He said, “I am to be with you but a little while longer. The hour of my departure is at hand. Remember my last words - Love one another. In this shall all men know that ye are my disciples.’’

“Lord,’’ cried Peter, ‘‘we will go with thee! Thou shalt not leave us, nor go without us!’’

“The priests seek to kill Thee, and Thy foot- steps are watched,’’ cried Andrew, earnestly.

“We will not suffer Thee, dear Rabbi, to go abroad alone,’’ said James, zealously; ‘‘our hearts and hands will defend Thee.’’

‘‘Whither wilt Thou depart, Lord?’’ I asked, for I was filled with anxiety. ‘‘Thou wilt not trust Thyself to the Jews!”

Thus we all, eagerly and tearfully, gathered round Him, troubled and grieved at the words He had spoken. He looked upon us lovingly, and said -

“Little children, I must leave you. Whither I go you cannot come.”

“Though Thou shouldest go to the uttermost parts of the sea, I will follow Thee, my Master and Lord!’’ cried Peter. ‘‘Whither goest Thou, that we may not follow? I will lay down my life for Thee!”

With one voice we asserted our devotion to our beloved Master, and secretly, I asked Him whither He intended to go, and why He forbade us to go with Him.

“As Abraham bound Isaac his son, and laid him upon the wood, so shall my Father cause me to be bound and laid upon the wood, a sacrifice for the sins of His people.”

“Not so! not so, Lord!” cried Peter. “‘I will die for Thee, ere this thing happen to Thee!” And the zealous disciple placed himself by the side of Jesus, as if to defend Him.

“Wilt thou die for me, Peter?’’ said Jesus, gazing on him with a sad, sweet look: “Verily, verily, Peter, thou little knowest what thou sayest. The cock shall not crow twice, ere thou shalt thrice deny that thou knowest me.’’

“Deny Thee, Lord!’’ repeated Peter, with amazement, grief, and horror in his looks.

“Yea Peter,” answered Jesus, firmly but kindly; ‘‘thou wilt deny that thou ever knewest me; for the time draweth near when there will be safety only in professing ignorance concerning Jesus the Nazarene.

“And all ye,’’ He added, while His voice grew tremulous, and tears glistened in His eyes, ‘‘all ye shall be offended because of me this night; ye shall be ashamed to confess that ye are my disciples, and ye shall think me a deceiver, and be displeased at me.”

“Yea, every one of you shall forsake me; for thus it is written: ‘The Shepherd shall be smitten, and the sheep shall be scattered!’”

At hearing these words, we knew not what to answer; but I kissed my dear Lord’s hand, and said, that if danger were coming upon Him, as it seemed to be, I would share it with Him.

When He saw that our hearts were troubled, and that we were sad, and that the faithful Philip wept aloud with grief, that any could abandon his Master, He spake further, ‘‘Let not your hearts be troubled; I go to prepare to prepare a place for you in my Father’s house.”

“Thy father, Lord, no longer liveth at Nazareth, and were he alive there are but two small chambers in his humble house,’’ said Thomas; “how sayest Thou that we are all to lodge there?”

“Thomas, thou canst understand only what thine eyes see. I speak of my Father who is in Heaven. In His house are many mansions.”

Then, as we drew near Kedron, Jesus then began plainly to tell us that He was to die, and that by His death we should be admitted into a heavenly paradise, and live forever.

We could not understand all He said, but we knew that He was soon to be taken from us; and sorrow filled all our hearts. After discoursing to us in the most touching words, He at length said:

“Come, let us go over Kedron, to the side of Olivet, into the garden where we love to walk.’’

We went out with Him, surrounding him as a guard, to hide Him from the Jewish spies, as well as to defend Him.

Peter and James went before. In this way we had passed through the dark streets of the city, and went forth from the gate, which Pilate suffered to be open day and night, because of the crowds at the Passover, continually coming in and going out.

The full moon shined brightly, and as its light glanced on the face of Jesus, beside whom I walked, I saw that it was sadder than its wont, while He spoke but little...

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